Tears for your Fears

Mind Games and Brain Teasers

It appears as though it’s that time of night again,lol Fact: before I go to bed I reflect on what I did that day,what could I have changed,anything I improved on,basically a self assessment. When I do type a post,every other night or so I try to do the same,it’s basically a snippet of what goes on in my head,the filtered PG version of course. Where do I begin:

Today I saw the cutest baby girl. I also saw a lot of white couples walking around with black children. Since I can remember my friends laughed at me not only when i said I was going to adopt a child,but when I told them i was going to adopt a Caucasian or Asian baby. giggles now,but not when I actually do it.
Sunday and yesterday were interesting to say the least. the happiness was short lived. Let’s just leave it at that.
I laughed so hard today I got a headache. I’m not complaining, especially since last night I was crying my eyeballs out until 3-4isssh.
While walking through the Airport I was approached by three thoroughly dehydrated men. Instead of just admiring from afar they came within arms reach and hit me with the classic “excuse me are you a model” and “you are stunning,where are you from” I just gave a fake smile and said no all while still power walking through the crowds of people in the airport. Yes it’s nice for people to dash you with compliments but sometimes you just don’t want to be bothered. I had just gotten off working from 6-2 and once I finally stopped crying and sounding like Shamu this morning around 3 I took a quick nap and woke up at 5,so I didn’t have the energy for it.
I’ve come to the conclusion that Mallory is a potential homie for life. When i woke up at 5 this morning I texted her “wake up nigga! we have crime to fight” she died laughing once she finally woke up. in our minds we’re super heroes. we have so many inside jokes and we’ve been friends seriously for 2 months tops. she’s cool peeps and is one of few who know when to give me space and can immediately read my emotions. like last night while I was making whale crying noise she sent me one text and didn’t harass me with 49574 “are you ok?” texts. we mesh really well which is rare with females and me!
Fun fact: waitresses make all their money from tips. So when you don’t tip it pisses us of. The few times I do work as a wait I HATE it. Our base pay is $3.25,as a cashier/hostess I make $8.50. people have bills to pay,car payments to make,be considerate!
My hair is sooooo big right now,I like it but I’d prefer no hair *sigh*
having a craving for Barberitos :(( Don’t feel like driving to Alpharetta or Athens,stopped at Kroger on the way home and got pico de gallo,but it’s not the saaaaame! *depressed*
My mother said she read my yearbook. Now this didn’t bother me at first but then i thought long and hard remembered that all my male friends that signed my yearbook put something vulgar in there. Like Maurice signed “Nkenna the beautiful: Threesome? Yes? NO? Maybe?” Nodebe signed” 10 reasons why Nkenna and Nodebe should f*ck* and the list goes on *adds this to the cons list of having male friends* looking back it’s hilarious but something I won’t show my children until they’re 40. Funny mainly because I was the nerdy track girl who got ZERO attention and everyone thought was hideous until prom night when I stunted on those HOESSSS :D well as much as I could have for someone who just found out that their date/ex-boyfriend had cheated on them the whole time they were dating….differnt story for a different day?!
I need to have some serious talks with many people. We’ll see how this goes..
Some days I have the sudden urge to just expose lives on twitter and other social media networks,but that’s soooo out of character and what does that accomplish? nothing,it just causes more problems,so I refrain and speak in vague general code statements.
I told myself I was going to ween myself off twitter and eventually just tweet once a day. then not for days at a time. yesterday was pretty successful then somehow I started talking about GG with Jenn on the way home and never got off Twitter. *sigh* this Hiatus/strike was short lived. I’ll try again tomorrow. The reason I’m doing this? During finals week/Cinco De Mayo weekend NOBODY hit me up. The excuses: “we thought you went home and you didn’t call us….We just looked on your twitter to see what you were doing…..” I went to dinner with y’all twice that week and I usually text everyone first. Also the reason I refuse to text people first anymore. Trying to distance myself. If people care they’ll make an effort….but nobody’s been making an effort since school got out. Only me,trying and looking pathetic.the norm. Also it wastes too much of my time.
Listening to a song and trying to hear all the beats and technical isssh >
As my time working in food services hopefully come to an end I’m realized that it’s taught me a lot of things. 1)I have a high tolerance for people’s crap and disrespect 2) everyone works at a different pace 3) some people just need a little nudge 4) small talk although cheesy helps and makes a world of difference 5) working in fast food has helped me perfect a fake smile! you could be having the absolute worst day ever and still have to come in and work 8-12 hours and nobody cares,just as long as they get their food.